Last night I was talking to some of my twitter colleagues and we had an interesting debate. So I decided to create a post on the topic.

How does society treat Thick Men versus Thick Women?

Do Thick Men get more respect?

Do Thick Women receive more sympathy?

Or do we have the same problems/concerns?

I want your thoughts thickettes and thick men.



  1. For the most part big fellas are teased as kids and though of a cuddly teddy bears when we get older. I don’t think that we get more respect but I do feel that we are treated differently even by large women. There have been many conversations that I have been a part of that plus size ladies will say they will not date a large man and there are no big guys that get drooled over like our smaller counter parts.

    Well if we can sing we get a pass but that’s about it. To be honest it is as if big men are invisible except for if we are needed to perform donkey labor or serve as someones body guard.

    Comment by Glen — October 22, 2009 @ 7:15 am

  2. I think big men don’t have it as bad as women but I still think they go through some of the same or vey similiar problems that women do!!

    Comment by Lola Vanguard — October 22, 2009 @ 7:33 am

  3. When I was growing up, I was a plus size kid, but I wasn’t teased. I dont know what that’s like. However, I did witness other plus size girls get teased. I never saw a plus size guy get teased. I think as women we are expected to keep up our appearances. I don’t think it’s excepted so much of men, although I do know plenty of men who are outstanding when it comes to keeping up their appearances.

    As far as dating goes, I’m on the fence on how I feel about that. I’ve never been approached by a plus size guy for dates or even a compliment. I usually date slimmer guys because that’s who usually ask for a date. I’ve seen plus size couples though, so my feelings on that are mixed.

    Comment by Lindsay — October 22, 2009 @ 8:03 am

  4. I think society may go easier on men, but they still have their obstacles. At least that what I saw growing up.

    Comment by Lindsay — October 22, 2009 @ 8:07 am

  5. I think some of the treatment is universal. There are just some people who have a problem with plus size folks in general so they equally discriminate.

    But I have to say that I am a plus size woman who really does not feel that my size is an impediment for anything in my life.

    But I have witnessed other people, men and women being treated in the foulest ways.

    So, I think its an individual thing and not necessarily a male/female thing

    I totally get what Glen said about plus size men being somewhat invisible because like he said even some plus size women don’t want to date them.

    But on the flip side, there are plenty of plus size men who get plenty of action from women in general.

    I think this is partly because some men are large and in charge so to speak. They are big but they are still confident and handle their business.

    Whereas women in general seem to have more issues with confidence, etc that fills their aura and probably adds to other people stepping over boundaries and passing them up as potential mates.

    I could go on and on..but i!

    Comment by Goody — October 22, 2009 @ 8:21 am

  6. Honestly, big men have it bad, but the Sista’s have it worse. I love BBW, my future fiancee’ is one. But most men see(or at least claim they see) big women as low self-esteem having, binge eating toys that they can get their kick from making fun of, but will bed one in a heartbeat, although most never will admit it. As a big man, I know the hardships, I’ve heard all too many times, “you’re cute, but I don’t date big men”, or some other crap. Some big women get let off by their breasts, booty or cute face. Some big men get the ok by being able to sing, or rap, or being rich, or having swagger. On the 100, I’ll take a big woman ANY DAY!

    Comment by Brandis — October 22, 2009 @ 8:37 am

  7. I think thick women have it worse. I agree with Glen that as a child thick boys may get teased worse though. I’m in the same position as Lindsay because I never got teased, dated some of the cutest boys growing up and never had a problem as an adult but I live in a state where everyone is considered obese so I probably have it easier. I can only imagine what a thick woman would go through in a more shallow state, one where looks mean more than what’s inside of a person.

    Comment by Stephanie Danforth — October 22, 2009 @ 9:00 am

  8. big guys and big girls are usually married or in a relationships eating good & getting laid on the regular. its the skinny folks blasting thru calories fending 4 themselves in this concrete jungle. its tough out there 4 the skinny folks….

    Comment by epp — October 22, 2009 @ 9:06 am

  9. I think this is a half empty/half full kind of thing. It’s in the entertainment industry that bothers the HELL out of me, and this is coming from this thick fella. I’ve watched enough entertainment shows to understand that the plus size female stars have it worst then big MALE stars!! You see guys like Kevin James and Jack Black and Ruben Studdard on TV and NEVER get hounded for their sizes. But you see plus size stars like Mo’Nique, Nikki Blonsky, and the new girl in the biz, Amber Riely and they get criticized for their size!! Forgive my profanity but this double standard bullshit has got to end!! Because I for one have had ENOUGH of looking at skinny minnie girls on TV and in Magazines!! Let’s give our big girls a chance to shine!!

    Comment by Terry, Jr. — October 22, 2009 @ 11:38 am

  10. I think weight discrimination stretches and can affect larger men and women. I do think popular culture perpetuates this distorted image of how a woman is SUPPOSED to look, so the hate tends to hit women harder. When you consider the cult of celebrity, a female celeb is ridiculed and practically crucified when she gains weight. Even if she technically still ISN’T FULL FIGURED. Pictures of male celebs lumbering on the beach, with their guts hanging over their shorts seem to go unnoticed. I recall watching a dating show, where an extremely overweight man was adamant with the matchmaker about setting him up with a “slender woman.” Fortunately, she gave him a reality check, by asking him what made him think it was okay for him to look the way he looked, yet demand that a Paris Hilton type was his due. He also tried to play the “women like me because I’m a teddy bear’ card.

    Fuller figured women tend to be labeled as being just “fat” or automatically assumed to be lazy binge eaters, in poor health and near death. It’s ridiculous.

    Unhealthy dieting habits seem to take precedence over living a healthy lifestyle, and health comes in a wide range of shapes and sizes. Fuller figured women definitely get taken to task… BIG TIME… particularly those in the limelight. Thicker women should definitely live for themselves, maintain their health, and let the nay sayers starve… because apparently, that’s what their problem is… they’re hungry and resentful because they can’t enjoy or have a healthy relationship with food.

    Comment by Coffey — October 22, 2009 @ 6:39 pm

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