For the past week I’ve been talking to some of my colleagues and we have been in a serious discussion about women who are in denial, scared and simply just insecure! Well ladies I am sick of your excuses and I am about to break it down for you. Before I begin understand that I am doing this because I care and I am tired of YOU settling for less!

EXCUSES! EXCUSES! EXCUSES!

I HATE excuses! It really makes me upset when women give excuses for their man’s behavior.

All you are doing it setting yourself up to be hurt again! Women you may already know in your mind that a man is no good but you let that heart of yours tell you that you’re in love and you NEED him. You can call it love if you want but after so many times of taking the same pain and hurt over and over again it can’t be love its DENIAL and your INSECURITIES wanting and begging to keep that dog that you call a MAN.

Let me guess, you are saying it has to be love because you aren’t insecure right? Well let me say this, if you know your man is no good you know for a fact he’s a cheating dog, he’s hit you before and has even verbally abused you, how in the hell can that be love? LOVE doesn’t hurt. Your relationship/marriage in my opinion is supposed to reflect God’s love and the last time I checked God’s love DOESN’T HURT! So no it’s not love it’s you being insecure because if you truly love GOD it shouldn’t matter how much you miss this “man” you would honor yourself and leave the dysfunctional relationship!

Now let me give you the top excuses that women give ALL THE TIME!

I AM MARRIED!

Yes I have heard this too many times! Yes you are married and yes it is good to see if you can work out your problems before you get a divorce and even some will say in their religion it is wrong to get a divorce but has it ever occurred to you that maybe you got married to a man that was just suppose to be in your life for a season? Just because you got married doesn’t mean it was God’s intention for you to get married to that person so now you are living with pain, hurt and feeling like you can’t get out of it because you are married. Please! God doesn’t want to see his children suffer. Life is already difficult why make it worse by living with hell & drama.

I HAVE KIDS!

Don’t try to deny it because women use their kids as an excuse all the time!

“I want my kids to have their daddy in their lives”– Hmmm you would rather have your kids grow up in a household filled with drama than to go your separate ways and have a more healthy and productive relationship for your kids? If he is a real man he will still be there for his kids even if you’re not together. However, most of the time the problem isn’t the men in this situation it’s YOU! YES YOU! Using your kids as a weapon against the man that hurt you is selfish, crazy and pathetic! You are hurting your kids more than you realize by doing this. Thinking you will get him back by using the kids is a recipe for failure! I have seen it too many times. Either the man stays away all together because they don’t want to deal with your BS or they come back just so they can have a relationship with their kids but they are miserable with YOU and still end up going out and doing what you were trying to keep them from in the first place.

“Who’s going to want me with all these kids” – Well if you keep thinking this way then I agree, who is going to want you. I truly believe the energy you put out is the same energy that comes back to you and if you believe that your children will hinder you from getting another man guess what IT WILL!

I DON’T WANT TO BE LONELY!

The “lonely” factor brings a whole lot of desperate tactics and yes men and even women can sense desperation! Never go the lonely route you’ll have the man having more sympathy for you than staying or coming back to you for the right reasons. Men usually never have a problem leaving a relationship so why can’t you? Trust you are NEVER lonely! You have GOD, YOU, FAMILY if you take some time to smell the roses you would see you are better off than what you realize.

In closing I would like to say the key is to LOVE YOURSELF ladies! This is an important factor that most forget. Most think loving yourself is loving the man enough for the both of you. NO! If you love and respect yourself then the man has no choice but to do the same. If you ever wonder why a man cheats or hits you and even though he apologizes he continues to do it look at yourself not the man. He may say he loves you but he definitely doesn’t respect you and can you really love someone and not respect them?

WAKE UP LADIES it’s time to regain the strength that GOD gave you in the first place.

 Here’s a video of Rosci from BET’s 106 & Park discussing her eating disorder.

Wow….very emotional…..it’s sad that society put this pressure on girls. It’s also interesting how so many little girls look up to women like Rosci. They like them because they have what society considers a “perfect figure” and a pretty face, but I truly believe that most women like Rosci are insecure about their body.

While people say that we as thick women/men are killing ourselves because of our weight, Rosci was doing more damage to her body and she is THIN.

People need to stop judging people’s outside appearance and judge everyone individually. As you can see from the video most people thought is was the thick girl who had the image issues. I personally believe that we don’t have a problem with the way we look. We are just frustrated with SOCIETY having a problem with our weight. Well society kiss our a**!

What are your thoughts?